Tuesday, January 30, 2007

The Lefty Phrase Book Vol. I

This is the first entry in a (hopefully) continuing series that lists popular euphemisms of the Looney Liberal Left, and exactly what they mean when they use them.

“Asians”: See Muslims

Christian: Savages who follow the religion of the oppressor.

Christianity: A religion of oppression and death, determined to stomp out all others in as violent a manner as possible.

Communist: Our over-enthusiastic and excitable colleagues on the extreme left. Term has been largely replaced. See Environmentalist.

Democracy: A sacred form of government that allows the people to choose who will lead them. Just so long as they choose us.

Environmentalist: See Communist

Extreme Right-Winger: Anyone who ridicules my beliefs.

Fascists: Those who disagree with us.

Islam: A religion of peace and love, with a pan-like love of the environment, that teaches respect and tolerance of all others.

Jews: Ancient victim of the vicious Christians, who have recently found themselves caught in the middle of the Christians’ extermination of the peaceful and childlike Muslims.

Muslim: Oppressed, wide-eyed innocents who practice a religion of peace and love.

Rape: Any form of heterosexual intercourse that doesn’t involve Bill Clinton.

Right-Winger: Anyone who doesn’t share my beliefs

“Tourists”: See Muslims

“Youths”: Young, rioting Muslims.

Zionist: An uppity Jew who doesn’t know which side his bread is buttered on.

No comments: