Can It Be True?

Rumors are flying about our good friend Fidel again. The word is, he has untreatable stomach cancer, and may be near death. This, of course, assumes that he isn’t already dead. We’ve heard this kind of rumor before. In fact, the most recent round of this game was what inspired the creation of this particular blog (or, at least it’s name, anyway). The details around this rumor are different this time, however. It seems the Cuban government is ramping up for a big funeral, modeled after the funeral of Pope John Paul II, which they hope to have broadcast worldwide. As if Castro deserves such an honor. A more fitting funeral would involve wrapping him in saran wrap, and then dumping him out the back of a Jeep Cherokee while cruising down I-95 at 85 mph, drinking a tall cold one, and listening to an infinite loop tape of “Ding Dong, The Witch Is Dead” performed by Ted Nugent with an all exile chorus.In any case, we will endeavor to keep our imaginary readers up to date on this glorious story.